3 Steps Forward, Bow Inward.

Sharing Space with the Deadly Duranta

Here in Singapore we just had two public holidays close together: Hari Raya Haji last Wednesday and then Vesak Day on Sunday. At times like this, ordinary life gets interrupted in the best of ways—people celebrate, pray, play, visit, share food and experiences… and some of us go for walks.

The “three steps, one bow” ritual at Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery for Vesak Day sounds simple: You walk three slow, mindful steps forward, then bow. Another three steps forward, then bow again. And you’ll be doing it in the night with hundreds of people. The bow is a full prostration, down on your knees with hands and forehead on the ground, palms upward to symbolise releasing negative attachments.

This year, in typically Singapore fashion, the ritual was diverted because of construction work. So instead of the previous two and a half hours, most people took about an hour this year. But the ritual remains: three steps forwards with curiosity and openess into adventure. Then the bow of humility with the reminder to accept that we aren’t ready to understand everything.

I walked too, with Sophia. She’s a bit unwell, so we’ve been walking a little slower than usual and pausing more than usual. But moving more slowly means I get to see more around me.

Like this gorgeous but deadly Duranta.

All the parts of this beautiful plant with its purple flowers and golden berries are highly toxic to humans and dogs (fatalities to cats and dogs have been reported).

Yet birds thrive on these berries and insects love the nectar—on this section of our walk there are always bulbuls, wax wings and thrushes as well butterflies and bees.

Just another reminder that in our shared spaces, not everything serves everyone the same way. A sacred holy day for one family is pleasant rest day for their neighbours.

I also (finally) got to read Taiwan Travelogue, something I’ve been meaning to do for some time. I’ve been hearing so many good things about it I was almost afraid to, in case it didn’t live up to it!

But I didn’t need to wait—I LOVED it!

The food, the characters, the meta elements, the ‘colonised’ living under current (Japanese) colonisation who were themselves descended from earlier (Han Chinese) colonisers… it was a wonderful, sweet, poignant, thought provoking read.

I can’t recommend it too strongly. If you haven’t picked it up yet, please think about it!

And at home, I’ve tackled a small project: this is the my office window, looking out between two balconies—

I removed the old curtains because they were too heavy, but the sun is getting bright again. So I hung up some (plastic) ivy culled from my late dad-in-law’s apartment.

Having it hanging here brings his presence closer than a photo on an altar would.

(and yes, they’re on curtain rings, so they can be pulled across to wherever the sun is too bright.

And it looks pretty good in the early morning with the light coming in too!

Yes, it still needs some work… but I’ll take it step by step and know it’s okay to bow out if it doesn’t work for me. Like the Deadly Duranta berries, things that nourish one person can be enjoyed by other eyes if not mouths.